Caring can be a wonderful experience, but it can also be isolating and lonely.  We hope you will find our stories about other New Zealand carers uplifting and inspiring, and help you feel part of the large community of 420,000+ carers!  Many of these stories are from past issues of Family Care magazine.  To request a subscription to our quarterly magazine, delivered directly to your home, phone (0800) 777 797, email sara@carers.net.nz, or read more at our Family Care section at the website!

The Gift of Compassion

The Daughters of Our Lady of Compassion, commonly known as the Sisters of Compassion, is a congregation founded in New Zealand in 1892 by Suzanne Aubert.

The Sisters and co-workers are committed to working together to meet the needs of Wellington's disabled, sick and elderly ... and visitors from out of the area who need a quiet place to recover, contemplate, or be near loved ones in hospital.

The Home of Compassion, located in Island Bay, was once known as the Compassion Hospital.

After almost 100 years in operation, the hospital closed in June 2002 due to lack of resources, and the fact that there were no longer enough Sisters to run it.

Back in the 1960s and 1970s up to 80 Sisters worked in the hospital wards. Now only a handful of Sisters live at the Island Bay Home of Compassion.

"There was such a feeling of despair after the hospital closed. There were no cars in the parking lot, the buildings were empty, and the facilities were in need of renovation," remembers Home of Compassion Archivist Sister Bernadette Mary.

The Sisters had to work hard to ‘keep the spirit of compassion going' as they wondered what the future might hold.

Eight Sisters living in a nearby house were getting very elderly and had trouble walking up the hill to get home.

 The congregation decided to refurbish one of the hospital wings and turn the Hospital into a home for the Sisters.

During this time of uncertainty, the Sisters really needed a boost of positive energy. They asked to have the edges of the building painted bright yellow.

Believe it or not, the yellow trim helped to lift the morale of everyone involved. The building was then remodelled ... the hospital wards became living space for the Sisters, and extra rooms are now used as retreat facilities for individuals and small groups that want to ‘get away from it all'.

"The guests are some of the nicest people you can ever wish to meet," says Sister Bernadette Mary.

The community also uses the facilities to provide education to parents (prenatal and antenatal classes), host support group meetings for parents of children with ADD, Art Therapy courses, and Reiki and Tai Chi classes.

Bernadette especially enjoys the times when she is asked to mind someone's baby. Her gift is thinking of others first.

Her reward is seeing parents and babies filling the hallways and meeting rooms once again.

What motivates the Sisters to keep giving?

You would think that after a lifetime of caring for others, the Sisters would be ready to retire. But with an average age of 80, and over 50 years of caring behind them, the Sisters are still actively involved in their community, and eager to carry on their work of supporting others as well as each other.

What is their secret?

"Feeling truly loved," says Sister Loyola, reflecting on a lifetime of satisfaction received from taking care of disabled children.

Her greatest reward in life is the lovely feeling she gets when the children she has raised come back to give her a big hug and say thank you.

She also believes that "if children do not feel truly loved while in our care, then we have completely missed the boat!"

At the age of 80, when most people are past retirement, Loyola is fit and actively participating in outdoor activities with the community.

She has learned to apply the principles of nursing and caring to the plants she now nurtures in her garden.

This mirrors her experiences raising disabled children throughout her life. Some of the children grew far beyond the expectations of others.

Loyola shares her wisdom by asking each of us to remember that "one cannot have a garden without a gardener".

It is obvious she has been given the gift of great love.

"Sit quietly and be at home with yourself" is Sister Josephine's advice.

After teaching up and down the Whanganui River for 18 years, Josephine has settled into the Island Bay community. She continues to teach English and Maori to the Pacific Island Sisters and also shares the benefits of meditation with others.

The positive effects of meditation can include "settling stress and providing comfort for those who are lonely", says Sister Josephine.

For as long as she can remember, she has wanted to be a teacher.

Sister Josephine has lived a fulfilling life doing what she loves. She looks back on her life and knows that she has been given the gift of teaching.

I asked Sister Patricia to explain what life is like living together in the Home of Compassion.
"We are family. We know and support one another like family. We are a very diverse group of women striving to live together as a community. We do everything together."

Patricia and her siblings grew up within the grounds of the Home of Compassion. Her father was a maintenance supervisor for the Home for most of his life, and her mother died at a very young age.

Patricia joined the congregation in 1945 straight after WWII. She was the first young woman from the local community to join the Sisters of Compassion.

Patricia has dedicated her entire life to serving at the Home of Compassion.

She spent many years of service assisting in the hospital theatre and completed her Post Graduate degree in Nursing in the 1960s. She was awarded the Top of New Zealand award for her high achievement in the midwifery exams.

Ultimately she was groomed to be a sub-matron to the head matron of the Home of Compassion.

Now, after many years of helping others, she has become frail herself with scoliosis and arthritis.

"I just take one day at a time. It takes all my time just to look after myself these days, but I do what I can to help the other Sisters. And we do what we can for each other."

Patricia describes her physical suffering as "mechanical problems" and is thankful that she is able to remain at home ... the Home of Compassion.

She describes herself as being physically frail, but spiritually strong and mentally capable.

Her gift is the gift of selflessness.

Her reward is the ability to finally relax and be cared for at this peaceful time in her life.

The Sisters show great gratitude for all of their years with the Compassion Hospital, and are thankful to still be actively involved with the Home of Compassion.

After a lifetime of caring for others, as well as each other, they have truly mastered the art of compassion.

The Home of Compassion offers accommodation and meeting facilities for people who would like a quiet place to stay, who have been caring for others, are supporting someone in hospital, or just need space for reflection and self-renewal.

Its facilities are available for small groups for retreat (day stay, or live in), seminars or conferences, or celebration of family events.

For more information visit http://www.hoc.org.nz/ or for bookings phone (04) 383 7769 (04) 383 7769 .Email homeofcompassion@hoc.org.nz

Home of Compassion, 2 Rhine Street (off Murray Street) Island Bay, Wellington 6002

 



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